Voices from Gaza: R., Photographer

R. sent the following messages to a friend between October 13th and November 12th:

Friday, October 13th (morning)

[from Gaza City]

I already sent the girls [aged 2 and 6] and their mother and my parents to her family in Deir al-Balah.

I'm fine, but the situation is very difficult. Massacres are happening everywhere.

There are no cars. I am thinking of walking the 20 kilometers to go be with the girls [in Deir al-Balah].

Friday, October 13th (evening )

[from Deir Balah]

People are still leaving Gaza [City], and there are people who cannot leave their homes, but the city is almost empty now. Every time I try to communicate with someone inside Gaza, they tell me it is a ghost town.

I try to photograph what I can

I tried to call Samar [a mutual friend] but there are no lines. I don’t know if they are there [Gaza City] or left

...

I bought some canned food, a box of cheese, biscuits, and sardines. I went out under the bombing and found canned food, biscuits, water, za’atar, dukkah, and cheese. There’s a palm tree here so I pick some dates every now and then and eat a fresh fruit. I eat light so I don't need to use the bathroom. The night and its worries have begun. Oh God, please save us from what is coming. I’m going to be with my older daughter, and then I’ll be back. She is crying in fear, because they started bombing again

At 12 midnight all telecommunications and internet services might be disconnected across all of the Gaza Strip. If you lose contact with us, know that we are fine, and no matter what pictures you see on TV, we will be fine, and I will do everything I can to keep my daughters safe and do the impossible to protect them 

What an unjust world this is.

I wish I didn’t know so many people in Gaza

I lost a lot of people. Every time I ask about someone, I’m told they were martyred or are missing

My older daughter who’s almost 7 already comprehends everything

[He encloses a drawing by his daughter.]

Saturday, October 14th

Good morning, it was a very difficult night but it passed

I am taking some pictures but everyone is nervous and the girls are crying all the time and I’m busy taking care of them

Everyone is waiting for the invasion. There are still people inside Gaza [City} who weren’t able to get out yesterday

They gave a four-hour window today for people who want to leave

Sunday, October 15th (morning)

There is no Internet or battery power most of the time

There’s shelling everywhere, but we don't even know where because there is no way to know where the bombing is

There are not enough medicines in the hospitals, there are no nurses or doctors, and the health system has totally collapsed

The communication network is very bad, we are okay

Dear God, get us out of this unharmed

Sunday October 15th (evening)

It seems my family's house was hit a while ago - someone just told me now. There are so many memories there

...

I’m not sad about the stones, we will build it again

Yesterday I said to my daughter, “I want to take you to Egypt.” And she replied: “To visit Rula?” [a family friend ]

Monday, October 16th

Today I turned the world upside down looking for sleeping pills and I still couldn’t find any Hahahahaaa

Since the morning, we have no water left, except for a few boxes of bottled water for drinking. The sea is close, but it is too risky to go there – the whole coast is full of gunships.

Maybe if it rains, we can collect water in cooking pots

Tuesday, October 17th

There is no water left in any of the water tanks, and there’s no water anywhere in the whole Gaza Strip. We have only one box of bottled water left that we want to save for the children

Wednesday, October 18th

I’m going to try and go out safely. Once again, pray for me that I’m able to get things and that I’m able to get back safely.

I’m fine, I found two boxes of water, al-Hmdallah. There was a lot of shelling but I got to the market and I bought oranges for my daughters

Saturday, November 4th (morning)

We were able to score a bag of flour

In a little while, we’ll go out and try to get some water

This is stolen flour

If they catch us, we’ll all be locked up

Hahahahaa

We paid money for it to the middleman, the seller, and of course to those who looted it in the first place

A very complicated process

The negotiations were intense

 ...

My water ration is now at 200 millimeters a day                            

I’m going out into the bombing again -- I have to find water. I’ll go to the same place I got it from before. Pray that I get it and come back safely from the trip

If you could hear how they bombard Gaza, the missiles, the earth is shaking from the bombing 

Saturday, November 4th (evening)

Every day we collect some olives from the tree, crush them, put salt on them and the next day eat them just like that

It’s time for the olive harvest but we eat them like this because the olives are going to go bad. We should be harvesting them and pressing them into oil but there’s no olive presses operating now

My Mom and Dad say hello to you

Mom says next time you come she wants to cook you a good meal

Sunday, November 5th (evening)

Good morning, thank God, we’re still okay

I want you to call a doctor for me

I need some type of sedative for children

My daughter is overwhelmed by fear, she complains about pains in her legs and stomach and is acting like someone who is bewildered and confused

Sunday, November 5th (night)

Today I was able to get hold of a gallon of water

I ate some dates and za’atar

Monday November 6th

I swear it was a difficult night

There was a lot of bombing and the children were all crying while they sat in the middle of the house

I couldn’t find any of the medicine that you wrote about [suggested by the doctor]

But we will use alternative medicine and put olive oil on her body and massage her muscles.

I’ll go out after a while to look for a new source of water but I’ll wait until the bomber jets go quiet. There was bombing near the water source we were filling from and I’m scared to walk through the agricultural areas  

Tuesday, November 7th (evening)

I took a bath. I heated saltwater over a fire. There wasn’t any fresh water available so I took a royal bath Hahahaha 

Today there was a massacre near us....

We’ve even stopped hearing the sound of the missiles falling. We just hear the sudden explosions

...

Yeah, they bombed a compound of houses all in one strike

Tuesday, November 7th (late night)

I prayed and took my daughters in my arms and lay down beside them. I felt dead tired - my brain was asleep but my eyes were still open

Wednesday, November 8th

They are a kilometer away from Al-Shifa Hospital

and there’s fighting in the streets in Gaza

Thursday, November 9th (morning)

I slept for 4 hours, interrupted sleep but good We have bombing on the street [in Gaza City] that we use to get to our home, it’s called Al-Baraka Street

Did they write something about it on the news?

Thursday, November 9th (night)

What news is there besides a pause for a 4 hour hours every day for the humanitarian corridor so people can leave Gaza [City]?

Friday, November 10th

What is the news writing about Al-Shifa Hospital and what is happening around it?

The [telecommunications] network is very bad, but we are okay

One of my cousins was able to flee today [from Gaza City] but the rest of his family is either dead or unable to get out. His mother is paralyzed and he is the only child. She told him to take his children and flee. He couldn’t carry his mother 

Saturday, November 12th

Good evening, how are you? We are okay, thank God. I have been searching for water and anything to buy since the morning. I only was able to make it back a little while ago, the roads were terrifying and there was virtually nothing to buy and what’s available has doubled in price

Thank God, we were able to get water, flour, a box of Prill [water purifying beads], a pack of cigarettes and pampers

My phone was out of battery today. It rained for 5 seconds and then there was no sun so we couldn’t charge the battery using solar power

I sip on the same cup of coffee every few hours from the morning throughout the day. We’re allowed only one small cup a day

My mother hid the bag of coffee along with the house key

 

R. is a photographer and devoted father of two daughters, aged two and six. One of his recent projects celebrated the lives and achievements of people in Gaza who lost their limbs during previous wars; his photographs depict how they go on to live full lives despite amputations. He is part of a regional network of documentary photographers and works as a freelancer for local and international news agencies. He lives in Gaza City but was forced to send his wife and daughters, and then his father and mother, and his sister and her family to Deir al-Balah, where his wife’s family lives. Then, he too had to flee the City. His home, his parents’ home and his sister’s home in Gaza were all subsequently bombed. As of this posting, he is still in Deir al-Balah, at his in-laws, along with thirty other family members.